Since my 100th blog post, I've been rather uninspired in my writing. Maybe it's because our lives are pretty boring, or maybe it's because I didn't want to do yet another post about how I struggle being a mother. The other day, I read a post by an old friend of mine who is unable to have children. It is a burden that is almost too much for her to bear. I've been thinking a lot about trials, particularly those of people in the scriptures and church history. It seems that any "saint" or true servant of God had to go through amazingly difficult struggles and endure them well. This makes me worry, since my life is pretty easy-breezy. Don't get me wrong; I struggle. Daily. I can barely take my kids out into public without feeling completely angry and embarrassed at their behavior. I struggle with feelings of self-worth in a world where just being a mom doesn't seem to be praise-worthy. But, if I can't even endure these paltry things without losing my cool, how would I be able to handle anything more? The more I think about these things and other people's perspectives, I guess we all have our own burdens. Whether yours is not to have children or to raise many, not to find your true love when you want or to be tempted to a life with someone that could be destructive, to be generous with your plenty or to have barely enough to scrape by, these are all important challenges that we are commanded to endure with patience, hope, and even joyfulness. I've got to be more hopeful that I'm doing okay by my children. I have to be more joyful in my everyday tasks.

Last night we read about Noah for Family Home Evening. I started singing an old Raffi song about Noah, and the kids started dancing around the room, giggling and singing along. It was such a nice moment of family togetherness. Clayton looked over at me and said, "How can you not think you are a good mother?" What a sweet husband. Maybe my burden for now is to be able to see the good in every person and every situation instead of feeling depressed or hopeless. My life really is so good, and I feel like I try so hard to do what's right. Maybe someday I'll be worthy of harder trials. Hopefully not too soon.