Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Luke and School

So, this school year hasn't gone quite as I expected.  We were expecting a rough start for our shy guy, but - as Luke is celebrating his 100th day of school this week - that makes for 100 days of Luke not speaking at school.  We've been working with a few specialists in the school district, and he apparently has "selective mutism". This is a fancy way of saying what we already know:  he doesn't speak in certain situations where he feels severe anxiety, aka: school, church, or any other public place or with anyone unfamiliar.  I felt relieved to at least have a name for it and know that he wasn't the only one (apparently there are 8 children in our school district with this particular issue).  Also, it was nice to know that there are specific strategies to help overcome the anxiety.  So, we've been trying really hard.  It's a difficult thing, because any pressure, bribing, etc. just make things worse and up the anxiety.  So, we've been having lots of play-dates (at least 2 a week - which may not seem like much to you, but it is a lot to me!), we come before or stay after school twice a week to practice speaking with each other with less pressure, and we've been making videos for Show & Tell with Luke speaking that the teacher shows on the t.v. to the class.  Although Luke hasn't felt comfortable enough to speak in the classroom yet, he has improved immensely.  He is much more comfortable having friends over to play at our house and going to others' houses.  He participates in class non-verbally with head shakes and smiles.  He says that he loves school, and he interacts with the other kids, speaking quietly to a few of them.  It is hard for me when I see some of the other kids making fun of him, but I'm proud of him with how well he's handling things.  My goal is to have him speaking to his teacher, at least in a whisper, by the end of the school year, but we'll see how things go.  
The first time his teacher saw him speaking on video, she started crying.  "I have never heard his voice before!  He is such a sweet boy."  We think he's pretty great as well!  P.S. The joke about "Don" he made up himself.  :)


8 comments:

The Lawlor's said...

Aimee, those videos are so great! What a good kid. I hope everyone can enjoy his voice and personality soon!

welltrainedmom said...

I love the Star Wars play! Luke is such a sweet boy! It actually took me a long time to feel comfortable speaking in school, too. Even in high school I still felt anxiety about it in certain classrooms. Life's all about learning and growing; Luke is doing great!

Rebecca said...

So cute and the 'Don' joke is great! I still can't believe he doesn't talk at school since he hasn't ever had a problem with us. Anyway, I'm sure it's hard on you guys. Hopefully things will just keep getting better. Love you!

missLaura said...

Aimee you are such a good Mom! I can't imagine how hard it is for you to see Luke so different at school. He really is a cute, CUTE boy. I loved the Don joke.
Clay was a good sport in the video too.

stone's eye view said...

Enoch is enraptured by the acting out of the ending of episode 3. Good work Luke!!!!!! Hard to imagine such an engaging boy being so shy - I'm sure he'll overcome it when he's ready.

Mike Owens said...

Landon has what his speech therapist has termed a "dysfluency" and we've had him going to Play and Say and speech therapy at our school district's early childhood center. Last week she told Hallie that he's a unique case in that she doesn't quite know what he has going on, but she's making progress. We live in an amazing age where experts can help out these little people so much earlier in life than even a generation back. Luke is an amazing, funny kid! I wonder if he could do homework on video to show his teacher what he has learned, and if seeing himself on video might encourage him to speak to her in person?

Krista said...

Oh Aimee!! We loved these videos! Andy and I sat and watched them and totally laughed! Luke's hilarious! What a sweetheart. I hope school gets easier for him. He is such a cutie. Miss you guys terribly!

Maja said...

That video was HILARIOUS!!! I really laughed out loud at all of them. Ahhh.... nothing like a good knock knock. But seriously, You are an AMAZING mom!!!!! Like wow. My hat is off to you. Seriously.